Goodbye 2018; Hello 2019: 5 of The Best Lessons I've Learned in 2018!

2018 has been one of the greatest years for me. I accomplished everything I said I would and even surprised myself with my strength and resilience. I graduated college, FIRST GENERATION COLLEGE STUDENT, published my first memoir/self help book A FATHER’S LOVE, did interviews, hosted my first open mic night, became president of my undergraduate chapter of Zeta Phi Beta Sorority Inc. and have a leadership position in my graduate chapter, attended my first ROYAL AFRIKAN GALA, WURUS Women’s Conference, returned to AACTS (Afrikan Awareness Critical Thinking Study Class) after graduation, first WOMEN’S AND MEN’S CELEBRATION and so much more. The greatest highlight of this year is the scare I got of my mother having ovarian cancer. It was stage 1 and is no longer effecting her, but I had to tell her after her surgery that she had it, held her hand while she cried, spent everyday with her while she was in the hospital, and did what she did for me, TAKE CARE OF HER! I thought I was strong and resilient and a WARRIOR….I didn’t know what any of that meant until this year when I had to put that to action.

During this year I learned many lessons, too many to share to be honest. But I do want to share the 5 most important ones I learned.

1. Trust the process; don’t rush the process

This was the most important thing I learned this year. I was so set on deadlines and trying to make things perfect for my book and my first apartment that I was rushing things. Especially trying to move out when I wasn’t 100% ready to. I had to learn to relax and trust the process. Everything will happen when it is suppose to as long as I’m putting in the work.

2. Believe in yourself

Always believe in yourself and your purpose. There will be times when things don’t seem like they will happen like you planned or that you are failing in someway. You have to believe. You have to keep striving for your goals and walking in your purpose.

3. Follow your dreams

Follow your dreams….ALWAYS!! Never let somebody tell you your dreams are too small or too big. Everything you want to do you can do. If i would have listened to people a lot of the things I accomplished this year wouldn’t have happened.

4. Strength and Resilience

This year I really learned what strength and resilience really was. I was able to tap into a self I didn’t know. A kind, patient, nurturing self. I felt like super woman when I took care of my mother this year. It was the scariest, greatest thing I could have experienced. Everybody has something that will make them have to tap into that part of themselves, just know we all have it and will know when to tap into it.

5. The art of forgiveness and moving on

This year forgiveness was on the front line for a lot of friendships and family. I had to dig deeper into my definition of forgiveness that I talk about in my book and put that forgiveness into action. FOR MYSELF!!! I had to put that in caps because a lot of people think forgiveness is for the other person. I had to learn how to let some people go and stop giving CPR to dead situations. Its okay to forgive and move on. You don’t have to repair or fix every relationship. Some relationships have run their course and are seasonal. Its okay. You will be fine.

Listed below are my 2019 goals. I will be creating sub goals weekly, monthly and daily to make sure I complete these goals. If you have not created goals use these as motivation to create a few.

My 2019 Goals:

1. Get my drivers license (I should have been got it)

2. Move into my FIRST apartment

3. FINISH “The Evolution of Nia” (Goal is 50 poems + affirmations); (23 are done) and start copyright process (leave 2020 for edit, organization, cover design… Publication date: December 30th, 2020

4. Attend more open mics and perform

5. Take more child care classes (to update and enhance my knowledge) *MIGHT get my 45 hours (infant and toddler) to add to my 90 hour (preschool) license

6. Take my blog to the next level (whatever I decide that is)

7. Build my savings account and credit score (working on the numbers)

8. Walk in my NIA (PURPOSE)!