You are the best example of how you want to be loved and treated. As people we want to be loved. That’s natural. We want to be loved my friends, co-workers, family, your partner, but when we don’t get that love we tend to question ourselves and their loyalty. The real question should be, “Do you love yourself?”
Loving yourself is an action. Not just a feeling or emotion. How do you present yourself? Do you practice self-care? Do you take time to heal? Do you set boundaries and not let people take advantage of you? If you were gone today or tomorrow would you be happy about the legacy you left behind? Do you tell yourself, “You are beautiful?”. Do you tell yourself, “I love you!” Do you speak heka (positive affirmations) into yourself? Do you take the time to hug, love and pray for yourself? Are you GENUINELY happy with the person you are….or becoming? Are you taking the necessary steps to change the things in your life that you KNOW need to be changed? Do you surround yourself with people who contribute to your growth?
If any of these questions were answered with a no or some hesitation…we have some work to do. You can not expect people to love you. You can not expect people to treat you right when you aren’t treating you right. You are the blueprint for how people will treat you. You set the standard for how people will treat you. People will only treat you how you allow them to treat you. And that all stems from self-love. If you love yourself you would never let somebody treat you below the value that you have for yourself. If you love yourself you would never accept less than what you deserve. You would never let yourself get so unhealthy you don’t know how to come back from it. You wouldn’t self-harm. You wouldn’t talk down on yourself.
Everybody gets to loving themselves in their own way, but the most important thing you have to do is surround yourself with people you want to be like. The type of people who love themselves and practice the things you want to practice. You can’t do this self-love thing alone. SELF MEANS COLLECTIVE; COMMUNITY; NOT INDIVIDUAL IN THE AFRICAN COMMUNITY.